Art Of Listening:

by Carole Bourne

“With the gift of listening comes the gift of healing” Catherine de Hueck Doherty

All human beings deserve to be heard from a respectful, compassionate and non judgemental space.  However, listening attentively (with an empty mind minus the internal criticism, dialogue or distractions) is easier said than done.

To listen well is to let go of the mind.  To listen well with empathy is to listen from the heart.  We can learn so much about ourselves simply by being willing to observe our listening habits.

As my one word mantra for the year is “connect” my inner gaze is gently focused on the lost art of listening at the moment.

I’m observing the effectiveness of my listening habits with a desire to connect more meaningfully and authentically to the world around me. I’ve discovered the more stressed or rushed I feel the poorer my listening skills.

I kinda like the idea that being more relaxed makes us better listeners!!

So with that in mind thought I’d share a simple ritual I picked up about 4 years ago from my restorative yoga teacher Judith Lasater.

If you’ve been following Rejuvenation Lounge for a while now you’ll probably remember me talking about this profound little habit/ ritual a few years ago. It’s simple.  It’s fabulous.  It’s worth repeating.

You might even like to take a moment now and tune in with your own inner gaze and quietly observe your listening habits. What do you do or don’t do when listening.  This simple practice alone can be potentially life changing  – if you want it to be of course.

Imagine what life would be like if you listened to the world around you with a deeper listening presence.

I’m sure you’ll discover new things about yourself (as I most certainly did) simply by noticing your listening habits.

A simple ritual for listening:

When someone is speaking simply clasp your hands together. It acknowledges you are present and prepares your body and mind for authentic listening.

By clasping your hands you help shift the energy out of your head and down into the palms of your hands. You’ve energetically made a conscious choice to become more present when listening.  It’s a beautiful thing.

Next …..

No answering  in your head

No interrupting with something more important about yourself to add

No finishing their words

No dismissing their words with weird facial expressions

No multi-tasking

No checking out

No face in screen and nodding pretending to hear them

No looking around – thinking when are they going to stop talking

… Simply listen in quiet stillness and with compassion


Peace, love and chocolate, Carole

Know you are always welcome to email me

healthylivinglounge ( @ )


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You might like to read:

This is an awesome book if you are keen to practice more moments of mindfulness in your life. Present Moment Wonderful Moment by Thich Nhat Hanh. Simple versus you can repeat when sweeping the floor, washing the dishes or drinking tea such as:  “This cup of tea in my two hands, mindfulness held perfectly.  My mind and body dwell in the very here and now.”


Join Carole at one of her rejuvenation or specialized retreats:




Carole’s retreats include deliciously gentle restorative yoga, therapeutic breathing practices, intuitively guided meditations and other profound nurturing rituals.

Everyone is very welcome. Perfect for anyone, any age.

Please click here for all the rejuvenating details.


{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }

Dave D. Doer February 7, 2013 at 1:08 am

Thank you for this encouragement. I am able to see your beautiful heart through you kind words of encouragement. Peace. Joy. Laughter. Love. Life. Many blessings. Chocolate is good for the soul also. Thanks for this.


Marcia February 14, 2013 at 8:56 am

Carole, I love this! The first time I read about the importance of listening was in the book ‘Dont Sweat the Small Stuff’ and took a lot from it. Appreciate the lessons you learned and are sharing with us. Thanks!


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